I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
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