i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
