Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
