I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
