So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i think my tv is drunk
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize