I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
