maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize
