She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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