What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Randomize
