he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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