we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
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do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
This toilet bowl is my home.
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