It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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