I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
