I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
