Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Randomize
