The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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