Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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