Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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