Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
