According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
