In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Randomize
