I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
