In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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