going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
