hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
