apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
i need some magic done to my vagina
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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