I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
