i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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