but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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