I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
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