yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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