Your mouth is God's brothel.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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