I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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