No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
im holly from the hills drunk
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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