Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
