I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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