She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
