Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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