i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
