doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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