I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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