I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
