OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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