i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
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God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
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I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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