I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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