Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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