Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize