I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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