we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
