Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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