So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
