i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
My breasts were aching with rage.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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